It was... my last blog post.

So, it was a mess. The clashing sparks of several clans which lead themselves towards identical goals yet in vastly different manners, differences which were significant enough to draw these social lines between them.

The way we live now is, fundamentally, indiscernible from the way we lived before. Fixated on some superficial changes which we obsess with we seem to ignore that we haven't really changed. So we rattle on about political change when really, perhaps, redefining the idea of politics would be the best way to solve our problems. But that is far too scary a leap for people to make.

I hope that everyone is like me in their little upsets. Nobody follows any set of rules completely, and those that do are hardly alive at all. I always strive to break all the guidelines I could simply for the sake of breaking them. That's really just how i have fun.

However, no matter what I do I seem to think about the future and whether I'll regret or be disgusted by my own past actions or thoughts. Well, we all have our regretted years right?

I intentionally wrote this without erasing anything just to see what comes to mind first. Nothing really has any tangible meaning though I'll admit I definitely love breaking the rules. Really, each "stanza" is a small bit based on something I heard from the room of people around me that inspired me to write it, albeit, a little bit more obscured than the original conversation was.

See if you can figure it out I guess. The first was political, the second was philosophical (Walt Whitman inspired me there), the third is me hating on rules for no reason, and the fourth is based on someone I know who could stand to take a little more small risks in life.

Goodbye Blogger, I really hate your interface. Google, make this screen a little more night-friendly, its not like people are writing these in the middle of the day.

Walter Whiteman and Jessica Poem

Taking a look at Whitman's notebook
Looking at this scan of Whitman's notebook (maybe its just because of my terrible eye) but i can make out almost none of the writing. What i can seems to meaningless broken sentences only Whitman could put into context. What i did notice, and that i liked, was Whitman's doodles. His drawings were pretty good. I didn't really expect a writer to be a rather talented artist too. His portrayal of form and shading is pretty great. So what i gained from this scan of his notebook was actually a more encompassing view of Whitman as a person. I'm literally twenty minutes from his old home in Huntington Long Island and i still only just now learned that Whitman both, kept a journal, and was a fairly decent artist. While a cant make out much if any of his writings, i can certainly appreciate the talent he had with a pen.

Reading a "transcript" of Whitman's notebook
Well that certainly cleared a lot up for me. I really think i like Walt Whitman as a person but some of ideas were incredibly progressive for a notebook he wrote in at the end of the 19th century. I should specify, his religious ideas where he proposes simply imposing "new, third religions" are progressive even for today. I like that Whitman was so open minded and sought to answer even fundamental issues like the approach of religious views and how they impacted the politics he was also so invested in. His writing about his close encounter with Lincoln during his campaign trail and the proceeding fictional exchanges he wrote with Lincoln really showed what Whitman valued. Not just his fundamental interest in "Libertad" but also his respect for leaders and the fact that Liberty was an aspect that had outlived any political body or empire. For his casual notebook Whitman's writings were incredibly enjoyable to read. Certainly more comprehensive in his personal ideas then i expected when i tried to read through myself.

P.S. Wow, what are the chances that I finally get around to watching Breaking Bad, while were reading Walt Whitman, and I take a trip up to Long Island within a few minutes of Whitman's old home? Its kind of got my interest in him peaked.